Battle of the Wits

(These are his reactions to Daddy playing with him-he has so many faces!)

Seth is 12 weeks old, nearly a quarter of a year! I can't believe how the time has flown by. So much has changed....but I've covered that enough for now. This past week Seth has begun smiling - A LOT! He is so amazing; I can't believe he's mine. And those smiles make up for all of the crying this past week.

Now, normally, Seth doesn't cry very much. However, Michael and I have decided that it's time for Seth to get into a good routine, and that includes sleeping in his own bed. I've been sick of sleeping in the recliner for some time now, but willing to do so if it makes Seth happy. However, I've been told that it will be better for him, in the long run, to start sleeping in his crib sooner rather than later. Being told that, I probably still would sleep in the recliner if it weren't for Michael. He's ready for a routine now, as well. And as hard as it is, we women are supposed to be wives first and then mothers. So, the battle has begun.

Babies get used to a routine rather quickly and will obviously fight change. And seeing as Seth is stubborn, I expected a rather good fight. What I didn't expect was how stubborn he would be. Friday night was the first night he didn't wake up every 20 - 40 minutes; in fact, he slept pretty well, especially considering he cried from 1:00 to 5:30 on Monday night. Last night he did well until about 4:00, when he decided that every 10 - 20 minutes was a good time to fuss. So, the past two nights have gone well. The days....well, every day has been a challenge. He usually cries the entire nap period - every nap period. I think the only reason the nights have begun to go so well is that he's exhausted by that time. I'm told to expect about three weeks of opposition. Well, I'm done with week one, and I guess I can go another two. I just hope he'll be accustomed to this schedule by the time the holidays roll around.

Seth's First Thanksgiving

As is typical, the holidays roll around and we lose track of time. Thanksgiving this year was wonderful - all three of ours! It reminds me, yet again, how fortunate we are in family and all the extras we don't deserve. How lucky am I to be able to have three Thanksgivings when so many people cannot even celebrate one?

Anyway, Seth is growing and changing! He's over 11 lbs now and over 23". One would think this would put him in his 0 - 3 clothes already, but not yet! Although we may have to start putting him in the shirts because he's just getting too long for the newborn shirts.



There have been a few subtle changes in Seth over the last few weeks. His hair has thinned out on top and his hairline has changed shape. (It looks like he may not get Daddy's widow peak after all.) His eyebrows are growing thicker and and a little bit darker, although they're still blonde. His eyelashes are also much darker now. His eyes are still gray, so we're thinking he may have my eyes.

Some of the more exciting changes include being able to hold his head up longer, smiling, and mimicing things. He was able to sit in his Bumbo chair for a few minutes while supporting his head before he got tired and leaned back. He also gave me his first whole-hearted smile, unprompted, today. He's been smiling in his sleep for well over a month and would occasionally smile when being played with or tickled, but today was his first time all on his own. Anyone who has seen Seth knows he sticks his tongue out a lot - it's like he's a snake tasting the air or something! For the last few weeks Michael and I have been playing with him by sticking our tongues out at him. Lately he'll stick his tongue out if we stick our tongues out. He's so smart!

Two Months

So my baby is two months old now. Not much has changed, yet everything has changed. It's hard to explain, but a parent knows. Subtle changes from one week to the next add up to be big changes, but how do you explain them to someone who doesn't see them happening?

The most obvious difference is Seth's weight. He hasn't been weighed in two weeks, but I know he's gaining. The skin on his arms and legs has filled out and his face is rounder and healthier looking. He's still wearing his newborn clothes, but not for too much longer - he's getting too tall for them. His 0 - 3 month clothes are still way too big on him, though. I think he may be stuck wearing gowns for a bit.

Seth's growing in other ways, too. He focuses on things more, mostly lights and the ceiling fan. He's usually great while shopping due to the constant stream of lights. He's also letting me put him down more often, although when he wants picked back up, he wants immediate results. Heaven forbid finishing a chore. That's one of two areas he hasn't changed much. He still wants to be held ALL the time.

I've given up on trying to make him sleep in his crib, because I was getting even less sleep that way. I figure Seth must need that physical contact for some reason, and I'm not going to refuse him that. Everything I've read and the advice I've been given says to give in to him and that he'll outgrow this need soon enough. So for the time being we're still sleeping in the recliner.

The second way Seth hasn't changed is his sleeping. Two to three hours is average, though sometimes he'll go as long as four hours. Of course I don't nod off exactly when he does, so I'm averaging much less sleep. Lucky for me I married a great guy who has recently started watching Seth between 9 or 10 until 12 so that I can get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. I didn't want to ask for it, but I was getting desperate and my patience was getting low. It's only been for the last week or so, but it's making a big difference.

Seth is going to the doctor tomorrow to get evaluated for a new formula. He's been having really painful gas for the last five days and it's horrible to watch him suffer through it. Mylicon doesn't help much, so I think the answer is to try something new. And I'm going to ask that he get his two month shots instead of going back in two weeks. I guess we'll see how it all turns out tomorrow.

Happy Days Are Here Again

Things are looking good this week. Seth is up to 9 lbs 6 oz. and is finally starting to fill out. He still has some catching up to do to fill out all of that loose skin on his arms and legs, but it's coming along. Any day now he'll be my chubby bunny!

Other than this piece of news, nothing has been happening. Of course we held our breath Tuesday night in the wait to hear who our president would be. Well, what can I say? Although I feared Obama had a good chance of beating McCain, I never really thought it possible. It was a really big blow to me as the results rolled in. I guess I thought America would be able to see through the liberal media's hype, but I guess I gave us too much credit. I really hope that Obama will prove me wrong and be a great leader for our country. Unfortunately, his plans to save our country don't make sense and he has yet to prove himself in any political arena.

Enter: Mother Guilt Complex

I realize I'm overdue on my blogging for this week and this is due to several factors.

I took Seth to a new doctor last Thursday since the doctors at UT did not seem very concerned that he was losing weight instead of gaining and that he would go for 10 days without having a bowel movement. I tried not to be the hysterical new mom who calls about everything, but I was not happy with the service I was getting. I may not have gone to med school, but I know that isn't normal.

This new doctor's office was recommended by Michael's co-workers and were supposed to be very child-friendly. So far, I am pleased with the staff and the doctor. This doctor was very concerned with Seth's symptoms and immediately requested bloodwork and an ultrasound and switched him to a new formula. His bloodwork came back fine and I'm supposed to find out the results of his ultrasound tomorrow. The doctor wants to rule out kidney or bladder disease, but his final diagnosis was "failure to thrive." Well, everything else I could handle, but those three little words just crushed me: failure to thrive...did that make me a failure as a mother that I hadn't switched doctors earlier? That I hadn't noticed how unhealthy this was for him? That I was failing him? Well, I know logically that it wasn't my fault, that I'm allowed a certain amount of mistakes as a new mom and that I thought I was doing what was best for him. After all, I did everything the first doctor said. But logic cannot explain this to a hurting mother. He's only 5 weeks old and I've already failed him.

So, that's why I haven't felt like writing lately. I didn't want to post a wholly negative post. So the positive note is that I took Seth for his first pictures today. They came out really cute and I can't wait until the twelfth so I can pick them up! Surprisingly, he was a good boy through the whole shoot and didn't cry at all.

The best news, though, is that Seth has gained close to a pound since Thursday and is back near his birth weight. Now if we can just keep pudging him up he'll be able to fit into his closet full of clothes!

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But I think we'll keep him!

Another week has passed and our little boy is now a month old. It's amazing how much he has changed in just that short amount of time. Looking at pictures, he's still smaller than what he was at birth, but his personality is changing and he's becoming smarter.

Seth now has periods where he is very alert and for longer stretches of time. He notices more now - if we put him next to the aquarium, he'll actually watch the fish; next to the stereo, he'll watch the lights; next to the mirror, he'll watch himself. He likes music and dancing. He's becoming this little person!

Most importantly, though, he is allowing me to put him down without crying more often. He is now getting used to the carseat, swing, and his crib. For whatever reason, he still doesn't like the bassinet. So today Michael and I are going to put his crib in our room and put my dresser in Seth's room. Hopefully this will make Seth (and us) happy and he will sleep through the night in his crib and I can finally sleep in a bed again!

As for me, I'm starting to get used to this mommy role. The sleep schedule isn't so bad anymore and I'm finding I have more patience. In the beginning, I would get stressed out by Seth's crying, but now that I know he's ok and he's just crying to get attention, it doesn't make me as nervous. Of course, him getting over his health issues has made the most impact in that respect. So now that things are getting easier, I'm wondering what my daily life is going to be like. I have all of these amazing female role models around me that are raising children and being productive in their own unique ways. I have a cousin who makes little girl costumes, a friend who makes personalized bibs, and a sister-in-law who not only raises four children, but homeschools them, drives them to all of their activities, and even grinds her own wheat to make her own bread! Now I'm not going to be so ambitious to think I can juggle all of that, but I would like to find something that is just for me. I need a hobby!

Hello, Due Date!

Our original estimation of Seth's due date was October 20th and was moved to October 16th and then finally October 11th. So, of course when he decided to show up on September 20th, a whole month earlier than the first estimate, we were definitely surprised. It's amazing to think that yesterday was when he was actually scheduled to arrive and yet I was holding a three week old baby.

Seth is doing much better this week. He no longer needs to be tested for his bilirubin, which is a HUGE relief, because we both hated going to the hospital every day. He also finally had his "bm" after 9 days and beat his urinary tract infection. So now our little boy is healthy and pretty happy. He's starting to be much more vocal about his likes (but mostly dislikes) and has taken to staying up all night the past two nights. I do not care for this new nocturnal activity, but realize that all babies go through it at some point. I just hope it is a short-lived phase. On a semi-interesting side note, Seth suddenly decided one day that instead of hating the pacifier, it was his new best friend. Now it's in his mouth most of the time, but only this one in the picture. Apparently the other ones are just not the right fit.

Nothing else has happened recently, so I figured I'd fill out this blog with a list of things I have learned over the last few weeks:

1. It is possible to take a shower in under five minutes
2. The sink and the trash can fill up at an amazing speed
3. It is much more important to empty the trash than it is the sink
4. One big box of diapers does not last nearly as long as one would expect
5. Company will inevitably drop by just as you are feeding the baby
6. Uncles are not comfortable with the idea of you feeding the baby, even if you're covered, and now call well before stopping by
7. There is absolutely nothing on TV between the hours of 1:00am and 6:00 am (or any time really)
8. It is very easy to give baby advice when you have slept through the night
9. Consequently, it is not easy to take baby advice when you have not slept through the night
10. No matter how little sleep you get, how dirty your house gets, or how chaotic your schedule becomes, it is all worth it when your little baby cuddles up to you