Two Months

So my baby is two months old now. Not much has changed, yet everything has changed. It's hard to explain, but a parent knows. Subtle changes from one week to the next add up to be big changes, but how do you explain them to someone who doesn't see them happening?

The most obvious difference is Seth's weight. He hasn't been weighed in two weeks, but I know he's gaining. The skin on his arms and legs has filled out and his face is rounder and healthier looking. He's still wearing his newborn clothes, but not for too much longer - he's getting too tall for them. His 0 - 3 month clothes are still way too big on him, though. I think he may be stuck wearing gowns for a bit.

Seth's growing in other ways, too. He focuses on things more, mostly lights and the ceiling fan. He's usually great while shopping due to the constant stream of lights. He's also letting me put him down more often, although when he wants picked back up, he wants immediate results. Heaven forbid finishing a chore. That's one of two areas he hasn't changed much. He still wants to be held ALL the time.

I've given up on trying to make him sleep in his crib, because I was getting even less sleep that way. I figure Seth must need that physical contact for some reason, and I'm not going to refuse him that. Everything I've read and the advice I've been given says to give in to him and that he'll outgrow this need soon enough. So for the time being we're still sleeping in the recliner.

The second way Seth hasn't changed is his sleeping. Two to three hours is average, though sometimes he'll go as long as four hours. Of course I don't nod off exactly when he does, so I'm averaging much less sleep. Lucky for me I married a great guy who has recently started watching Seth between 9 or 10 until 12 so that I can get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. I didn't want to ask for it, but I was getting desperate and my patience was getting low. It's only been for the last week or so, but it's making a big difference.

Seth is going to the doctor tomorrow to get evaluated for a new formula. He's been having really painful gas for the last five days and it's horrible to watch him suffer through it. Mylicon doesn't help much, so I think the answer is to try something new. And I'm going to ask that he get his two month shots instead of going back in two weeks. I guess we'll see how it all turns out tomorrow.

Happy Days Are Here Again

Things are looking good this week. Seth is up to 9 lbs 6 oz. and is finally starting to fill out. He still has some catching up to do to fill out all of that loose skin on his arms and legs, but it's coming along. Any day now he'll be my chubby bunny!

Other than this piece of news, nothing has been happening. Of course we held our breath Tuesday night in the wait to hear who our president would be. Well, what can I say? Although I feared Obama had a good chance of beating McCain, I never really thought it possible. It was a really big blow to me as the results rolled in. I guess I thought America would be able to see through the liberal media's hype, but I guess I gave us too much credit. I really hope that Obama will prove me wrong and be a great leader for our country. Unfortunately, his plans to save our country don't make sense and he has yet to prove himself in any political arena.

Enter: Mother Guilt Complex

I realize I'm overdue on my blogging for this week and this is due to several factors.

I took Seth to a new doctor last Thursday since the doctors at UT did not seem very concerned that he was losing weight instead of gaining and that he would go for 10 days without having a bowel movement. I tried not to be the hysterical new mom who calls about everything, but I was not happy with the service I was getting. I may not have gone to med school, but I know that isn't normal.

This new doctor's office was recommended by Michael's co-workers and were supposed to be very child-friendly. So far, I am pleased with the staff and the doctor. This doctor was very concerned with Seth's symptoms and immediately requested bloodwork and an ultrasound and switched him to a new formula. His bloodwork came back fine and I'm supposed to find out the results of his ultrasound tomorrow. The doctor wants to rule out kidney or bladder disease, but his final diagnosis was "failure to thrive." Well, everything else I could handle, but those three little words just crushed me: failure to thrive...did that make me a failure as a mother that I hadn't switched doctors earlier? That I hadn't noticed how unhealthy this was for him? That I was failing him? Well, I know logically that it wasn't my fault, that I'm allowed a certain amount of mistakes as a new mom and that I thought I was doing what was best for him. After all, I did everything the first doctor said. But logic cannot explain this to a hurting mother. He's only 5 weeks old and I've already failed him.

So, that's why I haven't felt like writing lately. I didn't want to post a wholly negative post. So the positive note is that I took Seth for his first pictures today. They came out really cute and I can't wait until the twelfth so I can pick them up! Surprisingly, he was a good boy through the whole shoot and didn't cry at all.

The best news, though, is that Seth has gained close to a pound since Thursday and is back near his birth weight. Now if we can just keep pudging him up he'll be able to fit into his closet full of clothes!

30 Day - Money Back Guarantee

But I think we'll keep him!

Another week has passed and our little boy is now a month old. It's amazing how much he has changed in just that short amount of time. Looking at pictures, he's still smaller than what he was at birth, but his personality is changing and he's becoming smarter.

Seth now has periods where he is very alert and for longer stretches of time. He notices more now - if we put him next to the aquarium, he'll actually watch the fish; next to the stereo, he'll watch the lights; next to the mirror, he'll watch himself. He likes music and dancing. He's becoming this little person!

Most importantly, though, he is allowing me to put him down without crying more often. He is now getting used to the carseat, swing, and his crib. For whatever reason, he still doesn't like the bassinet. So today Michael and I are going to put his crib in our room and put my dresser in Seth's room. Hopefully this will make Seth (and us) happy and he will sleep through the night in his crib and I can finally sleep in a bed again!

As for me, I'm starting to get used to this mommy role. The sleep schedule isn't so bad anymore and I'm finding I have more patience. In the beginning, I would get stressed out by Seth's crying, but now that I know he's ok and he's just crying to get attention, it doesn't make me as nervous. Of course, him getting over his health issues has made the most impact in that respect. So now that things are getting easier, I'm wondering what my daily life is going to be like. I have all of these amazing female role models around me that are raising children and being productive in their own unique ways. I have a cousin who makes little girl costumes, a friend who makes personalized bibs, and a sister-in-law who not only raises four children, but homeschools them, drives them to all of their activities, and even grinds her own wheat to make her own bread! Now I'm not going to be so ambitious to think I can juggle all of that, but I would like to find something that is just for me. I need a hobby!

Hello, Due Date!

Our original estimation of Seth's due date was October 20th and was moved to October 16th and then finally October 11th. So, of course when he decided to show up on September 20th, a whole month earlier than the first estimate, we were definitely surprised. It's amazing to think that yesterday was when he was actually scheduled to arrive and yet I was holding a three week old baby.

Seth is doing much better this week. He no longer needs to be tested for his bilirubin, which is a HUGE relief, because we both hated going to the hospital every day. He also finally had his "bm" after 9 days and beat his urinary tract infection. So now our little boy is healthy and pretty happy. He's starting to be much more vocal about his likes (but mostly dislikes) and has taken to staying up all night the past two nights. I do not care for this new nocturnal activity, but realize that all babies go through it at some point. I just hope it is a short-lived phase. On a semi-interesting side note, Seth suddenly decided one day that instead of hating the pacifier, it was his new best friend. Now it's in his mouth most of the time, but only this one in the picture. Apparently the other ones are just not the right fit.

Nothing else has happened recently, so I figured I'd fill out this blog with a list of things I have learned over the last few weeks:

1. It is possible to take a shower in under five minutes
2. The sink and the trash can fill up at an amazing speed
3. It is much more important to empty the trash than it is the sink
4. One big box of diapers does not last nearly as long as one would expect
5. Company will inevitably drop by just as you are feeding the baby
6. Uncles are not comfortable with the idea of you feeding the baby, even if you're covered, and now call well before stopping by
7. There is absolutely nothing on TV between the hours of 1:00am and 6:00 am (or any time really)
8. It is very easy to give baby advice when you have slept through the night
9. Consequently, it is not easy to take baby advice when you have not slept through the night
10. No matter how little sleep you get, how dirty your house gets, or how chaotic your schedule becomes, it is all worth it when your little baby cuddles up to you

Health Update!

I am very happy to announce that Seth is no longer at risk for jaundice! His level has dropped to 11.7! Now if we can just beat this urinary tract infection and get him to "make some twosies," we'll be good to go.

Where Have the Days Gone?

Well, my little man is now 2 1/2 weeks old and I fall more and more in love with him every day! He is doing pretty well, all things considered. I still have to take him to the hospital to have his bilirubin checked every day, but he is down to 13.1 from 16.7, so I'm thankful for that. Unfortunately he also has a urinary tract infection, but it was caught pretty early and he is on medication. I'm hoping by this time next week he will be all better and he and I can just enjoy our days at home.

Now if it was up to Seth, we would just cuddle in the recliner all the time. He is definitely learning to get what he wants and all he wants is to be held! I've been trying to break him of this by putting him in his swing, carseat, bassinet, etc., but he is much more committed to getting what he wants than I am to what I want. He has a set of lungs on him and he puts them to good use during these moments. My limit thus far has been 30 minutes of screaming/crying. I'm hoping that once he gets a clear bill of health I'll feel less guilty about putting him down and will stick to my guns. At this point he's in my arms day and night and I would eventually like to sleep in my own bed again. But I can't really begrudge him this little comfort right now - and I secretly love that he wants to cuddle with mama so much.

On a side note, our family and Michael's work have been so great to us. My mom moved into the house next door last month and has been doing my yardwork/landscaping along with my Uncle Marty. They've also been checking in on me every day to make sure everything is ok. Michael's dad is coming to visit tomorrow and his mom came up from Alabama last weekend. His sister-in-law dropped by last week and brought us a delicious dinner so that I could get a break from cooking. My cousin Angel checks on me every day or so and offers practical advice and my cousin Amy stopped by yesterday to bring Michael and I some birthday cake from her daughter's birthday party. Michael's co-workers have been showering us in gifts and have been full of well-wishes. We may not have all of our friends and family near us, but we definitely don't feel like we're lacking any love.

Outside of my lovely little family, not much has been going on. I'd like to say I've spent a lot of time catching up on reading, but with Seth in my arms, it proves difficult. So, instead, I've watched A LOT of movies/tv shows. Michael and I have been working our way through The Fresh Prince of Bel Air again and have been getting into the Halloween mood by watching horror movies. And when all else fails, I resort to my Harry Potter movies. I swear I'm not one of those Harry Potter geeks - it's just so easy to watch because I don't care if I fall asleep during them. If anyone has any movie recommendations (particularly horror movies) please let me know. I could definitely use something new to watch. Oh, we did get to watch the VP debate - GO PALIN!

In closing, I have to give props to my husband again. He really is so great! He shows me so much attention and is always willing to help in any way he can. Even with my post-pregnancy body, he still makes me feel like I'm attractive to him. Although this has not been a big issue for me, I know that if he didn't act so attentive, it probably would be. He even sleeps on the couch so he can be near Seth and I. I love the men in my life!